????

[strangerpeople]

WELCOME ABOARD


[The first sensation you feel is a headache. It's brief, slicing, sharp. It passes soon after you wake up, but it is there nevertheless, and the pain is not easily forgotten. Perhaps your eyes also blur as if roused from a deep sleep; perhaps your tongue also feels off, like you swallowed a bug. It's not pleasant.

More unpleasant, though, is the second sensation that dawns on you all-this is not your bed. This, in fact, is unrecognizable. It is not anywhere you recall coming to, willingly or otherwise. It's a room with a bunk, and there is a strange smell in the air that is hard to ignore.

No, you are no longer home. Any possessions you may have had on you are gone, save your clothing and a strange watch you can't get off, no matter how hard you try. And when you run into the hallway, well-you might find yourself running into others who might be just as confused and scared as you are as the area around you slowly sways, up and down, left and right.

What is this place? Why are you here? Who are all these other people?


What is going on?]

Comments

[somuchshipping]

[Wait, but... HOW can you not know what electricity is!? You're supposed to know that everyone has the ability to travel from planet to planet using space ships! What are you, in the stone age!?]

Uh, what? YouDon'tKnow WhatElectricityIs...?

[godspiousjasper]

I do not! Am I supposed to?

[ As far as he was concerned, Astermite was the sole energy source for powering things back home. Electricity? Don't know her. ]

[somuchshipping]

I mean... yeah.

...Do you at least know what gasoline is?

[godspiousjasper]

I do. It's fairly new but I know enough about it to know what it is.

[ It wasn't a common thing but thankfully it's something he at least KNOWS what it happens to be. ]

[somuchshipping]

Okay, good, you at least know that. But it's been around for thousands of years. What, did another species just introduce you to fuel? Are you being uplifted or something?

[godspiousjasper]

Thousands of years?

[ He shook his head without even missing a single beat. ]

Goodness no. Not that I know what being uplifted is, but gasoline is new and hasn't been around for as long as you have said it is... which reminds me, sir.

[ Roland pointed at Hermes' screen. ]

You're the most advanced automaton i've seen yet! I didn't know they had the capability to walk around and speak!

[somuchshipping]

[Well, he IS the only v1 Hermes, so...]

[Hermes's earflap things lower in confusion.]

Really...? You haven't seen any other Hermes around? Or Circe? Or Pan? Or Hephaestus? Or Poseidon? Or Enyalios?

...Any Mercuries?

[godspiousjasper]

I'm afraid not. You're the only one of your kind i've seen.

[ A pause and his expression turns a bit sympathetic here. ]

Are those friends of yours?

[somuchshipping]

[This is all so super strange considering just how prevalant AIs are throughout the universe.]

No, not really. Especially not Mercury...

[godspiousjasper]

Ah. My apologies, then.

[ He truly does look genuinely apologetic for what it's worth. ]

I take it you're not on good terms with this Mercury fellow.

[somuchshipping]

Nobody is and nobody should be. His pranks always end up being cruel and sadistic. Not like mine. His ruin peoples' lives. Mine are ones everyone can laugh at. And he enjoys being a huge jerk!

Ugh...

[godspiousjasper]

Well. This fellow truly sounds quite unpleasant indeed.

[ He hummed for a second or two, giving things some thought here. ]

Can you give me any examples of pranks you've done and then ones of his?

[somuchshipping]

[Hermes manages a huff.]

Okay, so one of the things I'd do is just like... Whoopee cushion under the chair or unscrewing the saltshaker top or putting a small bit of marshmallow into a straw so people can't suck through it. Mercury's the type of guy to wait until a few days before you're having a wedding and then woo and steal your girl and drive off laughing at you and stuff like that.

[godspiousjasper]

What?? That's positively deplorable! I must agree that yours do seem quite harmless in comparison to such acts.

[ Don't mind him looking genuinely appalled that someone out there exists like that. Not even going into that he doesn't quite know what a whoopee cushion is, really. ]

What he appears to do appears to be genuinely quite cruel and careless and lacks a good sense of humor.

[somuchshipping]

Yeah... It sucks that we can't fire him, though, as his job is painting things. Some paintings are very essential and he's the only one that can do it. And he always picks on me!

[godspiousjasper]

Do you happen to know why it is that he appears to single you out like that?

[ There's so many things he wants to ask but one thing can only be addressed at a time here. ]

[somuchshipping]

Because he's an asshole like that.

[godspiousjasper]

Ah? Sorry... he's a what?

[ Yeah. That word really isn't something he knows. Coming from the 1800's and all. ]

[somuchshipping]

[Hermes is taking that as admonishment.]

Yeah, yeah, I know he's a Roman, but I'm not calling him an asshole BECAUSE he's a Roman! I'm calling him that because of his lousy and annoying personality! Everything about him just pisses me off.

[godspiousjasper]

[ There's a pause as he considers what the other had said, then nodded to himself quite proudly. Like he'd just figured something out thanks to those words. ]

So you're saying someone with that title is one who has a lousy and annoying personality? A bad individual, correct?